I ran 125 miles in the month of August. That's the most miles I have ever run in a month.
I'd like to celebrate. And one day I might.
But my heart is heavy.
This has been a hard week for Maddie.
(Of course it's been a hard week, the first week of school each year is hard. With two-a-days, she starts the year worn out and it's downhill from there!)
Nonetheless, four days into the school year, Maddie's kidney has flared along with her asthma and she is one sick girl.
Friday morning I took her to the hospital for blood work between a pep rally and an Algebra 2 quiz. Her urine is brown. She made it all day at school, reported for practice on time and performed at the football game. Want to see her performance? Click here!
Immediately after the performance I took her home. Since 9pm Friday night she has been in bed. It is now 9pm Monday.
The only other time she has been out of the house was at 11pm on Saturday night when I took her to the emergency room. Her asthma was out of control and we needed help.
Since the hospital visit she has been on breathing treatments every 3-4 hours along with a heavy dose of steroids. I'd like to think that she could start weaning herself from these soon, but given that she can't even walk across the house without getting winded, we shall see.
She would also like to go to school tomorrow.
So in the midst of Maddie's crisis, I am running longer and stronger than I ever have. I can feel myself getting leaner and faster.
And it hurts. Cause Maddie can't run.
We are even selling her treadmill.
She wanted to run, but her body can't. We know longer want the reminder.
It's times like these that are hard. I have to remind myself that it's okay to get down. It's okay to eat the donut for breakfast on occasion cause your child is sick and there is NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT. But I can't and won't go back to the daily donuts and being 40+ pounds over weight.
Instead, I am going to get up at 4:15am and run.
Because I can.
I'd like to celebrate. And one day I might.
But my heart is heavy.
This has been a hard week for Maddie.
(Of course it's been a hard week, the first week of school each year is hard. With two-a-days, she starts the year worn out and it's downhill from there!)
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| First day of School |
Friday morning I took her to the hospital for blood work between a pep rally and an Algebra 2 quiz. Her urine is brown. She made it all day at school, reported for practice on time and performed at the football game. Want to see her performance? Click here!
The only other time she has been out of the house was at 11pm on Saturday night when I took her to the emergency room. Her asthma was out of control and we needed help.
Since the hospital visit she has been on breathing treatments every 3-4 hours along with a heavy dose of steroids. I'd like to think that she could start weaning herself from these soon, but given that she can't even walk across the house without getting winded, we shall see.
She would also like to go to school tomorrow.
So in the midst of Maddie's crisis, I am running longer and stronger than I ever have. I can feel myself getting leaner and faster.
And it hurts. Cause Maddie can't run.
We are even selling her treadmill.
She wanted to run, but her body can't. We know longer want the reminder.
It's times like these that are hard. I have to remind myself that it's okay to get down. It's okay to eat the donut for breakfast on occasion cause your child is sick and there is NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT. But I can't and won't go back to the daily donuts and being 40+ pounds over weight.
Instead, I am going to get up at 4:15am and run.
Because I can.
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